Butterfly On The Wall

While all of the people I knew from childhood were pairing off and getting married, I was living a very different life. I don't know why I felt the need to separate from the herd and explore the world independently, but I just did. I came out of USC like a wild horse with her mane on fire. I wanted to run and leap and spin and fly.  I kept hearing ' Follow your heart '  find your passion ' , 'do what you love and the money will come', 'give without expectation', 'walk the talk' 'you create your world'  ~  the word was that the success was in the doing. it was not about money , but about love and finding your purpose. I went to places feared by others~ I wanted to understand completely. I did not want to live in rote without thought without reason. So i let strangers in. and they did change me. some for the better, some for the darker,  but all adding depth of character and wider perception. All the while , Music was the...

I had a reunion through Facebook that went back 30 years or so ~  the last time I saw these Pinecrest kids was 6,7,8th grade maybe ~  the girls pretty much looked the same, but the boys had morphed from little teen boys into men ~ the beauty of it was that I could look in the eyes of these 45 year old strangers and see the exact child I knew so well as if no time had passed at all  ~  they felt like family ~  So when I caught them up with a reader's digest version of my career adventures ~ some went onto check out my IMDB page ~  The thing that was brought to my attention was that I was only credited with 3 parts. And all of these parts were in films that have titles that sound like porn!!!   How frustrating ! I have worked my ass off in this business ~ I have avoided sleeping with old men for good roles because i thought i would find a more dignified way in. But alas and alack ~ the only things i could get on my own terms were small feature...